Things a man will only tell you if he’s really comfortable with you

• Posted on January 5, 2015January 5, 2015
• by Nana Kwesi Coomson
• Comment

Before you become freaked out or offended by something your guy opens up to you about, maybe you should be honored: there are some things a man will only tell a woman he is extremely comfortable with.

His family’s medical history

Men feel a responsibility to portray their family as a strong unit to the outside world. Only when a man feels that his secrets are safe with you, and that you will have tact, will he let you know that there is a history of heart disease or mental illness in his family.

Therapy

Men tend to be much shyer about talking about going to therapy. In fact, far less men are comfortable than women even going in the first place! Only when a man feels that you understand him through and through and won’t be shaken by him admitting that he needs help, will he open up to you about his therapy sessions.

His weaknesses in his career

A man needs you to feel that he protects you, and part of that is never letting on if he is struggling in his career, or that he might not have what it takes to make it to a certain level. Only when a man knows you love him for the right reasons will he be honest with you about his weaknesses in his field of work.

Times he was immoral

We’ve all done things we’re ashamed of—we’ve treated people in a way we wish we wouldn’t have, or done something clearly immoral. Only when a guy knows you have confidence in who he is today, and will be able to put his past behind him, as he has, will he tell you about times he was less than a standup citizen.

His major mess-ups

Everybody at some time is a major klutz, or makes a mistake that was so easy to avoid, and that had major and terrible consequences. Only when your guy knows you’ll still find him sexy when you visualize him humiliating himself, will he tell you about those stories that still make his cheeks turn red.

How his parents affect him

Everybody—men and women—like to pretend that their parents don’t get under their skin anymore, and that their parents’ relationship doesn’t absolutely affect how they handle love. Only once your guy feels you’re comfortable with his vulnerable side will he open up to you about how his parents have shaped him, especially in his romantic relationships.

His weirdest sexual fantasy

Your man has to know that you know that he is not a pervert, or a freak, or a misogynist, or a psycho before he reveals his wildest sexual fantasies to you.

The weirdest p*rn he watches

Refer back to last point. But also, a man has to know you’re totally secure in your body and in your sexual skills before showing you the porn he watches, or else you might wonder if what he sees on the screen is what he wants in real life.

Physical traits he’s insecure about

Nobody wants their partner focusing on their receding hairline, or stretch marks or small hands. A man has to feel 100% secure in the fact that you find him completely sexy, before he lets you know that he doesn’t find himself completely sexy all of the time.

He needs a night to himself

Before you get angry at your guy for confessing to you he needs a night away from you, keep in mind that the only reason he even told you was because he believed you were understanding and secure enough in yourself to hear it without getting angry!

He’s broke

Every guy wants to be able to treat his girlfriend, and he wants to be able to do it without her feeling guilty about the money he’s spending. If a man opens up to you about his financial limitations that means he believes you love him for who he is and will enjoy his company on a cruise or at Taco Bell.

His BIG dreams

Everybody has a big dream. But admitting our big dreams to ourselves is scary enough, let alone to somebody else. If your guy dreams of being a Broadway star, a celebrity chef, a millionaire, he’ll only let you know that when he feels you totally believe in him. And when you also know he has a good head on his shoulders, and is willing to put in the work that dream requires.

He’s jealous of another man

Once a man admits he is jealous of another man, he opens himself up to comparison. So only when he feels your love for him is unshakable will he admit that another man makes him feel like, well, less of a man.

One of your friends annoys him

It takes so much comfort and trust between a couple for either person to admit to the other, “Your friend drives me nuts!” If your partner tells you this about your friend then that means that he feels you respect his opinion enough to not immediately reject it, but that you’re secure enough in your friendships to not be bothered by someone criticizing them.

Madamnoire