Times it’s totally OK to keep secrets in a relationship

fabaabfdf62fb21ca5ebfd5a4067b38e_LHow does that old saying go? “Secrets, secrets are no fun…but sometimes you’ve got to keep them if you don’t want your relationship to self-destruct like a wayward pop starlet”?

Maybe that’s not quite right, but it can be necessary to keep certain things to yourself, as long as they’re not relationship-wreckers about cheating or having to move to a faraway country in two weeks. Here are a few examples.

1. You actually had a crush on his best friend first. Whether you met your guy’s best friend first or he was so hot he kind of blinded you to your boyfriend’s charms in the beginning, he probably doesn’t need to know. This is especially true if your stomach still swoops a little every time you see said friend.

2. You want a baby, like now. Marriage and baby fever are totally normal things for both men and women to experience (especially if you see these precious photos of pups in weddings!). In some instances he’ll get there first, but other times, you’ll be the one who’s ready to have a whole houseful of babies way before you guys are that committed. If you’re both at that stage, giggle away over cake tastings and those wee baby socks. Otherwise, keep your screaming ovaries on the DL until you two are on the same page.

3. Your parents didn’t think he was good enough for you. If he has actual issues, like being rude to waiters or his motivation in life could be summed up with an image of a sloth, then they may have a point. But if they just don’t think he’s cute, tall, or wealthy enough, save him from the doubt and keep it quiet.

4. The way he chews makes you want to puncture your eardrums. When you date someone seriously, the most innocuous things can drive you to the brink of insanity. But if it’s something he can’t (or shouldn’t have to) change, then what’s the point in making him feel self-conscious about it?

5. Your best friend is questioning her sexuality. Unless they actually affect you or you have the OK to spill, big, life-changing secrets about your loved ones aren’t yours to tell.

6. His paintings aren’t the greatest. Of course you admire the outcome of your love’s various hobbies simply because you adore him. But if you know you’d have a different opinion if you looked at his watercolors with an unbiased eye, there’s no need to tell him as much. He probably offers a similar kindness when you ask him what he thought of your shower rendition of “Lady Marmalade.”

7. His mom drives you crazy. This has been the lady in his life for, well, his entire life. If she’s outright hostile, sure, let him know. But make sure it’s always about her actions. As for her personality? Just don’t go there.

-Glamour

ABOUT: Nana Kwesi Coomson

[email protected]

An Entrepreneur, Corporate Social Responsibility, Corporate Communications Executive and Philanthropist. Editor-in-Chief of www.233times.com. A Senior Journalist with Ghanaian Chronicle Newspaper. An alumnus of Adisadel College where he read General Arts. His first degree is in Bachelor of Arts - Political Science (major) and History (minor) from the University of Ghana. He holds MSc in Corporate Social Responsibility (CSR) and Energy with Public Relations (PR) from the Robert Gordon University in the United Kingdom. He is a 2018 Mandela Washington Fellow who studied at Clark Atlanta University in USA on the Business and Entrepreneurship track.

View all posts by: Nana Kwesi Coomson  

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