21 dating things every 20-something woman needs to stop doing

1. Stop stressing about his exes. It’s a toughie, but it’s time to let it go. They are exes for a reason and unless he’s lying about seeing her and talks about her every waking minute… there’s no reason to think there’s still some wild passionate flame burning. If there was, wouldn’t they be together again?

2. Stop judging him on his job. As long as he can pay his own way and isn’t asking you for hand-outs, it shouldn’t matter whether he’s a stockbroker or a shelf-stacker. As long as he shows you he loves you.

3. Stop internet stalking him. Sure, if this is a Tinder date, it’s probably sensible to check you aren’t being catfished and that he looks like a normal human who exists in real life. But that’s where it ends. All you’ll do is learn a ton of stuff about him that you then have then pretend you don’t know.

4. Stop judging him on his living arrangements. Do you live in your own house that you own? Good for you. For most of us, living with parents/randoms/weirdos is inevitable until we win the lottery or move in with a guy.

5. Stop judging him on what he’s wearing. Shoes a bit gross? Hair a bit too gelled? Men don’t really GAF about clothes so it’s basically the girl equivalent of them judging us on our bra size. Dodgy t-shirts do not a bad boyfriend make. You know what they say about books and covers.

6. Stop applying stealth makeup at 6am. The days where you wanted to sneak off to the bathroom so that you look immaculate when he wakes up in the morning need to end NOW. It’s just your normal human face, if he’s repulsed by that – you shouldn’t be in his bed.

7. Stop trawling through his Facebook. Seriously, stop. Madness lies this way. It’s a universal fact that 90% of people’s Facebook pictures involve them looking like a drunken fool. What he’s like in actual real human life is what matters.

8. Stop wondering if the sex is good. Make it good! If you want to know what he likes, ask him. If he’s not doing the right things to turn you on, tell him (nicely). We’re all just humans, not mind-readers.

9. Stop stressing about the ‘right time’… to kiss, to have sex, to meet each-others friends. As long as it feels right for you, it IS right. If he really likes you, it won’t matter whether this stuff happened on the first date or the 50th.

10. Stop expecting giant romantic gestures. We’re not 14 any more. Maybe he doesn’t turn up at your door with a cute gift just because he felt like it or send you messages about how much he adores you, but so what? This isn’t Pretty Woman, it’s real life (sadly). If he makes you feel special and is kind and thoughtful, he’s a keeper.

11. Stop waiting for him to ask you out again. GO AND LIVE YOUR LIFE. He either will or he won’t. Sitting by your mobile while checking signal and making sure it’s not on silent is a waste of time you could be dancing with your friends or binge-watching Netflix.

12. Stop trying to guess what he wants. WHAT DO YOU WANT? That is the actual question to be answered. If you want him to commit to you and he isn’t, sack him off and find someone who wants the same thing.

13. Stop letting him shove your head onto his peen mid blow-job. In fact, stop letting him shove you around in bed full stop. You’re a grown woman and you’ll blow if you want to.

14. Stop being crap at accepting compliments. If a guy goes out of his way to compliment you, enjoy it. It’s not sexy OR good for your own self-esteem to do yourself down.

15. Stop stressing about the minute details of his text messages. As long as he sees you when he says he will, replies to your texts and makes effort at actual conversation with fully-formed words, try not to fret over whether he’s put a kiss or when the blue ticks appear on WhatsApp. Guys are just not big into writing massive love confessions, but it doesn’t mean they hate you.

16. Stop trying to be sexy. The main word there being ‘trying’. If you spend hours debating how to sound flirty or feel pressured into sending x-rated pictures… something isn’t right. If he fancies you, he’ll fancy you anyway. NEVER let someone push you into doing something you don’t want to.

17. Stop being a bikini-line psycho. You know what we mean. Women have hair and even if you remove it, it grows back. If a man can’t handle you between shaves, he sure as hell won’t be able to handle a relationship.

18. Stop expecting him to complete you. The idea of finding your one and only other half that makes your life full is a lovely one. But a relationship’s only going to be happy when you’ve learnt to be an independent, self-sufficient lady who’s got her shiz together first.

19. Stop worrying about his baggage. Everyone has baggage – life is one giant bag and we’re all shoving stuff in it as we go. Don’t let what happened 5 years ago have an effect on what’s happening between you now.

20. Stop worrying about your body and what he thinks of it. If he finds you sexy, he finds you sexy. The more ‘you’ you are, the more in love he’ll be with the person you actually are. Plus, the sex will be WAY better. Trust.

21. Stop trying to be cool. No-one is. And if he’s acting like he is, he’s faking.

– UK Cosmo