While on the road from savvy singledom to happily hooked up, chances are good that, at one time or another, you’ll find yourself in the following scenario: You meet someone new. He or she looks good, sounds good, and has plenty of potential. There’s just one thing: His or her lip-locking abilities are, well, lackluster.
Honestly, your honey can’t kiss his or her way out of a paper bag. What’s a savvy single to do? Before you decide to ditch your pucker-challenged cutie, first give the following five tips a try. They may just turn a bad kisser into a pleasing and passionate lip locker.
Assess the situation: Let’s be honest. While exciting, the first time you kiss someone new can also be incredibly nerve-racking.
Instead of writing your date off as hopeless, first consider the circumstances surrounding your bad kiss. Was your date nervous, tipsy, and/or in an environment that wasn’t conducive to a first kiss?
Your sweetie could’ve just had a case of performance anxiety. And if all other signs point to “go,” your date deserves the benefit of the doubt.
Give that cutie a chance at redemption by creating a comfortable kissing environment on your next date.
Think about snuggling on a comfy couch, standing on a secluded street corner, etc. You may be surprised at how much better the kiss is the second time around. And if so, congratulations! Problem solved. If not, keep reading. There’s still hope!
Set an example: One of the best ways to inspire a satisfying lip-lock is to gently take the lead. Lean in, plant your lips on your date’s, and show ’em how it’s done!
By demonstrating what you like, your date will pick up on your physical cues and, with any hope, match your kissing style.
It’s important to do this early on in your courtship so that any bad lip-locking habits can be nipped in the bud and quickly corrected.
Play the mirror game: If your new love still isn’t catching on, you may need to try a more direct approach.
When the time is right (not after an argument or a long), snuggle up to your sweetie and suggest that you play a little game. Keep in mind that diplomacy goes a long way when trying to retrain a lousy lip-locker.
Softly suggest that you play the mirror game. Start by saying, “First, I’ll kiss you and then you kiss me the exact same way. Then, you start and I’ll follow.”
Once you’ve gone a couple of rounds where you consistently reinforce the kisses you enjoy, your cutie should catch on. If not, don’t give up just yet. There are a few more tips to try.
Communication is key: In all aspects of dating and relationships, communication is essential to your success. And positive reinforcement goes a long way!
Instead of criticizing your cutie’s kisses, praise him or her when a pucker pleases you. Not only that, but regularly reinforce how much you enjoy the art of kissing.
By having an open dialogue about what you like and how important puckering up is to you, even the dimmest date will start to get the message.
And if your cutie wants to please you, he or she will work hard to improve those smooching skills. When this happens, let your sweetie know with plenty of praise how much you dig those kisses.
Practice makes perfect: Just like dating takes practice, kissing may require some practice, too. Set aside plenty of time on each date for a good old-fashioned make-out session. This is something you can both enjoy and learn from. Plus, it can be a fun way to pass the time! And as you grow increasingly comfortable with one another, the smooching will most likely become more satisfying.
If not, you’ll need to decide if the lack of improvement is a deal breaker or not. While dating a bad kisser can be a drag, it doesn’t have to signal the end of the relationship. Good luck and happy kissing!
-Harmony